Past-Present-Future tag

Its been some time since amazing wetspark’s amazing editor Mathew had tagged me. I am taking it up now.

The tag: Two questions from the past, present and future. Answer them and then tag your friends from the blog-o-sphere. Leave a comment on their blog letting them know they have been tagged and you are all set.

Past

Your oldest memories…

No one is going to believe it, but the oldest I remember of my life is being rocked in a cradle in the living room of our old house by my Valyammachi (Granny) and the then-maid we called Anithedamma (Anitha’s mother). I don’t know how but this visual has been etched in my mind for as long as I can remember.
So I’d rather not say more – I mean I have started all the way from age less-than-1!

What were you doing ten years ago?

Probably doing last minute studies for 10th grade half yearly and fighting with my best friend Ros cause she talked to another girl for more than 5 minutes.

Present

Today

Overslept and missed bus, went to office, made another wrong sms mess (sms meant for one going to another – becomes a mess when another is little known to you and especially when another is a celebrity), saw half a movie at film festival.

Tomorrow

Oversleep and miss something, but please no messes tomorrow! Going to interview a debutant director. Yaiii scared and excited.

Future

Where do you see yourself 14 years from now?

Oversleeping, missing buses, making lotsa messes – that much is guaranteed. I mean I will be me. And then the good things – having a job I love, and lotsa plans I’d rather not talk about for fear of not happening.

If you build a time capsule what would it contain?

All that I write, having written all that I saw and imagined.

Forgot. Passing the tag to

Anila – she usually does poems but lets see.
Seema
Nickelodeon
Salil
Qwerty – you have got enough time to do this now Q!
PS – not sure if she takes tags but putting her name here anyway

An equalist, I am

Since I have left blog barren for a few days I think I will finish my tag-tabs one by one. There is 2 pending, and in order, Seema’s feminism tag is the first. No rules to list, its just to write about my take on feminism. Now even before I start, I want to pass this tag to Amrutha. She has been talking about what is and what is not feminism in her blog in such well-written words that I keep commenting “exactly”.

Anyway what I have been saying ‘exactly’ to was that feminism is NOT a woman doing everything a man can – as seems to be the general impression among many. It is being able to do what one wants to. So cooking and cleaning is not demeaning work; doing it when a woman wants to do it is not being a victim of male chauvinism or male domination. Same way, if a woman wants to do bungee jumping or fly planes, she should be able to do that and not stopped because she was a woman. Wants to – are the keywords here.

Now I will tell how I, like the general mass had a misguided idea about feminism without even thinking that’s what it is. As a child when I saw only Mom or some other woman cooking in a house and the men gets to do nothing, when grown ups kept telling me I should start following that and learn to cook and clean I used to ask “Why is Dad not doing it” or “Why are you not telling this to bro?”. The answers came immediately “Cause he is a man and these are the works of women”. I hated it right away. Without meaning to, I found my wanting a sense of justice making me shrink away from the typical womanly qualities and duties. For years I was a tom boy, I tried to use and do everything my father and brother did – from handkerchiefs to kicking stones on my way to never using makeup and of course staying 10 miles away from kitchen. I never got to find out if I actually like to cook cause I strongly believed if I once set my foot in that arena, I should never be able to get out of the “woman tag” I have been so trying to run away from. And when Dad asked about this insensitivity to helping my Mom I used to get away with “I want to follow you and do what you do” or “If Nish learns, I will too”; and “I don’t like it” when I felt really rebelling.

I now know that was a completely wrong approach. I wasn’t trying to establish feminism, but I wanted to be treated like a human being and not as a woman who had to do things because she was a woman. Every small act of unjust treatment or lines from someone in that line, irks me to the core. It comes with any kind of unfair treatment; I mean its not just gender based; including ones that let me have a better place on some unfair ground.

I hate the dowry system and it always boils my blood when I hear of people (most of them women) talking about it like it’s a taken for granted arrangement, like it was part of marriage. I hate movies that come with the message- why should a girl have education or why she should be the first to sacrifice or why she neednt have a job. I hate it that when a marriage happens, it’s a taken for granted affair that women give up or transfer their jobs to be with husbands and it was not even a question with regards to the man. I am not saying men should always, I just don’t like it that its not even thought about or considered. A man or a woman gives up job to be with spouse is the kind of accepted rule I should like to see.

There is probably a lot more that I have a say on, as regards a woman’s place – that there is nothing like that. One thing I have learnt is trying to prove I can do something was not feminism. When you say prove, you are losing the entire essence. Not bothering to explain your actions and knowing exactly what and why you are doing is.
I have once debated with a friend who said reservations in a particular university for women had to be there, and I argued if a man and a woman with similar qualifications applied for the job, it was unfair that the woman was chosen solely because it was a woman. But his point was that qualification alone was not enough, you had to consider background as well – he said that given a man and a woman from India, chances are the man having studied all his way here was much easier done than a woman who probably had to go through a lot of turmoil being a woman. That could be true, exploitations on women in the past were not a new story. Finally I agreed he had a point and if background was pretty much the same as well, then there should be no preference (on the other hand same could go for man – if he had a difficult time coming there, then he should be given a chance.)

It all comes back to treating men and women as a single entity – humans. Where reservations were considered it had to be – where a human deserved it and not a man or a woman. Where jobs were concerned it must be as he/she wanted to. Where duties were considered, as humans could and should – and not a defined set, one each for men and women. Where behavior was concerned, it’s the character he or she grows up to, how can it in anyway depend on gender? Agreed there are certain qualities that can be concluded to attach with one gender at least as far as majority was concerned, but majority didn’t define all!

I guess what I am saying is, I am an equalist (not in dictionary, but I have been using it so much, its got to be there by now). Equal treatment to all humans and I am happy, no expectations cause it’s a he or a she or a lower caste or a different religion or a darker color or has a lower income, thank you very much (I shouldn’t have added that, that makes it dramatic, the thank you – oh what the heck!)

Tagging
1. Amrutha – I would perfectly understand if she doesn’t want to do this, she has already talked for eons about it.
2. Mathew – not tit for tat, but I wanted to hear what he has to say
3. KT – This is the second tag I am giving her, would like to hear hers as well
4. Nikhil – totally busy man, I hope he gets time to do this some time.
5. Nims – she should have a lot to say now!
6. Vids – I am not sure if she finally became a regular blogger, but would like to see what the new generation has to say about this. Eh Vids? 😉

5+1 addictions of life, another tag

Taking up Nims’s tag : list the top 5 addictions of life. As usual, making that 6.

1. Sleep or else day-dream: an angelic habit. You could shed brains, you could waste time and you could have your own set of double chins and your own little flab, and even nurture it – what fun! Sneeking in day dreaming after reading it another blog. Cant believe I missed it, thats what I do all the hours I am not sleeping!

2. Internet: Growl. You could put it to good use or you could use it to waste time. I am not going to reveal which choice is mine. Growl.

3. Magi Noodles: Great choice of food. You could give yourself the benefit of losing all fitness and turning into a fat unhealthy mess. If you are lucky, you could end up with appendicitis.

4. Books: Like them lots. I use it to stuff bags from library, to keep beside pillows, to pay huge fines and to not read. I know, life is so good!

5. Tom n Jerry and The Wonder Years: Absolute entertainment. You could waste time by watching 8^th and 9^th reruns. And after that switch to Top Cat and Full House.

6. Music: MP3 player or youtube constantly in use. When I can’t find both I use my mouth. You can play ‘em (youtube/mouth) aloud at 3 in the night. Your neighbors would appreciate that.

Stopping at 6. Friends from college would know I have a particular affinity/addiction for the number, most of them ended up writing 6 pages of curses, err praises in my autograph book. (Liz, Krips, Zac, Divs, Nims, Laks, Lovly, Sandeep listening?)

Thanks Nims, without this, my blog should have been inactive for long.

Tagging 6 –

1. Tedy – been a while since he wrote in any of his blogs – and that’s a lot!

2. M.Rose – absence a little too loud. Come back!

3. Kavi – newest blog friend. Not sure if he does tags, but it’d be interesting to read!

4. Hari – Tit for tat. Bad hair for good tag. Err that doesn’t make sense but take this up, will you?

5. Usha – I miss her…!

6. Silverine – Most famous blogger I know, well at least in my google reader. Guaranteed to be some promising entry!

The no-love tag :-p

Been a little inactive. Lot of blogs to catch up, replies to comments always delayed by 2 or 3 days. Must be what Dhanya calls the blogger’s block. Taking up Hari’s tag, to come out of indolence

RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

RULE #2 Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. If your lover betrayed you what would your reaction be?

Not sure but with the present absolutely nonchalant attitude w.r.t. love and romance, I might say “Oh alright see you around then and good luck with the new girl”

2. What’s it that you see in an ideal partner?

Non-existence

3. What, according to you, is the perfect date?

Walk-date. Meaning walk all the while, chewing some ground nuts, stopping at a thattu kada for coffee/dosha.

4. Would you like to have children soon enough? Or would you wait till your mid-thirties for the first child?

Replacing question: Do you like children?

Yup love them. Absolutely love them.

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?

I always say it’d work out great if that really happened. But then not sure what would really happen – if they can still remain best friends as well, great. Oh this is about me- so I’d rather not risk it. I like having my best friends as my best friends, don’t want to lose them at the cost of a possible bad relationship.

6. Which is more blessed: loving someone or being loved by someone?

More blessed – being loved was what I’d have thought some time back. But finding self incapable of any such feelings, being able to love someone genuinely, would be a major blessing.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you love?

None if it is the partner we are talking about. I might be doing this tag at a wrong time, I seem completely insensitive. Old age I guess.
Now if its about my little nephew, I am waiting every single second to see him again.

8. If the person you secretly like is attached, what will you do?

Oh darn my luck – if I actually find myself capable of loving someone, which in itself is a rarity, and then I should find that the loser has found someone else – Well I will be dashed!

9. If you could root for one social cause, what would it be?

Promote adoption

10. Do you lie?

Ah finally one place I can score, I have a reputation for not lying even for trivial causes. Not that I am too proud of it, had more often landed me in trouble. Honesty is troublesome.

11. Where do you see yourself 10 years from now?

Hopeful me – famous author of 3 books
Pessimistic me – unemployed gulp

12. What’s your fear?

If the plans I have made for myself right now may not work out and it is not just about authoring books and finding employment.

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?

A thinking and quite a nice little kid

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?

Single and rich (Single was the attraction there, not what came with it, hmph!)

15. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously who will you pick?

Haha me in love with 2? That’s like asking Akshay Kumar if he could quit marrying. If I do, I must be a really dumb person! Wont pick both cause chances are I will regret not choosing other for rest of life!

16. Would you give all in a relationship?

Yes I think I will. And give all doesn’t imply give in or give up.

17. Would you forgive and forget someone no matter how horrible a thing he has done?

Might forgive, but know from experience will never forget

18. Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?

Single

19. Your all time favourite song. Only ONE. And why?

This was the toughest. Ethetho from Punnagai Mannan – the first song I learnt to sing as far as I remember.

Tagging

1. Jay – newest friend and blogger who wont let you comment
2. Philip – haven’t seen his entries for a little too long, and he is probably tagged already!
3. Amrutha – Now this is going to be a serious affair.
4. AJ – Hahaha I don’t think he will do this, but if he does, boy it should be fun!
5. Mathew – cant wait for his hilarious answers
6. TF – Author of Lucifer House Inc. Fresh after a series of bride hunts he should be well prepared for this

Avoided married friends, but anyone who likes to take this up, do and let know. Its fun to read this one.

The quotes tag

Disclaimer: I did this in a hurry so not sure if I missed a lot too many things!
My third tag. Mathew, keeper of a hilarious blog has tagged me. May his hilarity grow ten fold. This is the tag: “Jot down 5 of your favorite quotes from the various books you’ve read. If you don’t have the books with you now, googling (Wikiquotes and the like) can be used to find them. Tag five people and acknowledge the person who tagged you.”

My quotes, I have loved a lot many but don’t have the habit of keeping them in mind.
(Short while later): I ended up wikiquoting and came up with a lot too many quotes I had long forgotten. Now compressing them into 6, (I have already decided to do tag+1) could be a problem. Quotes have a thing against compression.

So, not necessarily the best I remember, but the first few I found good enough, and all of them essentially coming into the list, cause they make little or no sense. I have decided to follow my idol, Wodehouse. His quote on writers being this, and this does not count to be in my tag cause it is from no book.
“I believe there are two ways of writing novels. One is mine, making a sort of musical comedy without music and ignoring real life altogether; the other is going right deep down into life and not caring a damn.”

Now the tag.

1. From Hard News, by Jeffrey Deaver

(3-year old)Courtney: “I want juice”
Rune: “Say please”
(3-year old)Courtney: “I want please”

Well one more from Hard News.

“This business about fairy tales having happy endings – that was bull shit. Sometimes people melt. People go away. People die. And we’re left with stories and memories, which, if we’re lucky, will be good stories and good memories and then we get on with our life.”

2. From Bridget Jones’s diary, by Helen Fielding

Narrated by Bridget: I got in the lift to go out for a sandwich and found Daniel in there with Simon from Marketing, talking about footballers being arrested for throwing matches. “Have you heard about this, Bridget?” said Daniel.
“Oh yes,” I lied, groping for an opinion. “Actually, I think it’s all rather petty. I know it’s a thuggish way to behave, but as long as they didn’t actually set light to anyone I don’t see what all the fuss is about”

3. From To Kill A Mockingbird, by Harper Lee

Scout: “Naw, Jem, I think there’s just one kind of folks. Folks.

Jem: “Scout, I think I’m beginning to understand something. I think I am beginning to understand why Boo Radley’s stayed shut up in the house all this time… it’s because he wants to stay inside”

4. From Adevntures of Sally, by P G Wodehouse

“And she’s got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.”

5. From Right Ho Jeeves

“I’ve been through hell, Bertie.”
“Through where?”
“Hell.”
“Oh, hell? And what took you there?””

6. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone by J K Rowling

Hermione Granger: “I hope you’re pleased with yourselves. We could all have been killed — or worse, expelled.”
Ron: “She needs to sort out her priorities!”

So this one is in addition. I am not sure if it is in a book, I think it is from a television series based on the Wodehouse books.

Bingo: “Bertie!”
Bertie: “Bingo!”
Bingo: “She telephoned!”
Bertie: “She telephoned you, eh? That’s good, shows some friendly spirit.”
Bingo: “Well, she didn’t phone me exactly; when I picked up the phone, I was standing beside it.”
Bertie: “What’d she say?”
Bingo: “She said, “Let me talk to someone with a brain.” “
Bertie: “Ah.”
Bingo: “But it was friendly, the way she said it.”

I have to pass on.

1. Nithin. He is already due to finish my previous tag
2. Srijith. Bro, here is a job for you.
3. Preeti Sharma. I know its going to be hilarious
4. Dhanya. Not sure if someone has alreay tagged you with this, but seeing a tad too bit of inactivity in your blog.
5. Usha. Again not sure if someone has tagged her already
6. Nikhil. Ditto.

Tagged: Mah Bucket List

Ok my second tag! And I owe it to Dhanya who keeps a really neat blog, something when you are done reading you could use to lull yourself to sleep cause it provides the audio requirements for your count-sheep-to-sleep activities. Thanks Dhanya 🙂

The tag. Creating bucket list. Totally new to me. The tag and the movie. I have to write down my wish list, with the things I want to do before my breathe says “Alright I am tired, I am going to stop coming out and going in now. Ta!”
I have made a wish list sometime back but that was not having a dead line in mind (dead line?! Ouch! That’s some pun!)

Anyway I will bring in 6 here, cause that’s my favorite number and cause if I brought the whole list I’d need 6 pages.

1. Live all by myself for a while: this has been in my mind ever since childhood. Alone in an apartment (its got to be an apartment-building, my imagination could sometimes be too monster-specific to live in a stand-alone house!). Where I have planned to leave things as they are, and not worry about waking up or cleaning up or any other ups! One room to sleep, where I hope to have a clean bed (which considering my habit of confusing bed for the universal bin could be a difficulty). One room to have a huge drawing board with a white paper all ready for action, where I will have a lot of sunlight coming in from an adjacent balcony and a huge glass window facing the sky (my apartment is going to be top floor, next to the moon :D). This room will also have plenty of novels lying all around the floor and one table and chair with lots of white paper and a pen to write. Another room where I could watch TV and dance. Ok that’s too many rooms. But then there won’t be a kitchen. So it’s alright.

2. Study/work abroad for an year or 2: I’d prefer student life more cause my intention in going abroad is seeing as much of the world as possible in one short life span. So possibility of that happening if I am tied up with work (hah me and work!) is not so promising. Well this wish could actually be rephrased to see as much of the world as possible. Cause I want to meet people and see places all over the world. Talk to them, know them, make friends. Or sometimes just stay away and watch the world run in front of me while I am just a silent spectator enjoying what I saw. Sounds sadistic! But I just meant the good stuff.

3. Author a book or more: ahh this is one huge big wish. One I really hope would happen in the near future. But something tells me hoping and wishing is not going to create chapters for me. Hmm I can’t decide on what to write. I personally prefer humor. But then I am not sure how much that sells. As a first time author I have got to establish myself as a they’d-read-anything-she-wrote writer. I am thinking thrillers and I am thinking detectives. I am thinking Percule Hoirot 😀

4. Adopt a 2 year old girl: another long time nourished wish. Don’t know the possibility or practicality of this happening, but while I am coming out clean, why not. But then if this happens I can’t let myself pop out soon. So the bucket-hitting will have to wait.

5. Stage dreams: Make one great speech to the right crowd (people who are familiar with the inactivity rates of my tongue on stages would appreciate its listing here). Attend and perform a ball-room dance once. Act in a movie once (yes yes don’t laugh). Play one neat song on my violin.

6. Sea/Travel/Crazy: Be a hitch hiker once without any aim or destination, except just hiking wherever I pleased to. Sail on a boat all alone once, and stop in the middle to stare at the sea, or maybe even fishing (I am letting the fish go back). Swim, surf once. And adding two crazy ones: stop in the middle of a street to stare at a statue open-mouthed completely non-conscious of the world around me (I have no idea what makes it wish-list worthy); second, wear a long white wedding gown like this one and get a picture taken of it and then sleep with it on a couch peacefully (I know. I am nuts).

Ah forgot. The second part. Passing baton, Dhanya send it to 9 others. So no clue of how many. Now since I have done 6 all along, I will choose 6.

1. Gov: He has been doing too many tech and too very rarely, he needs to take a break, both from tech and from the break!

2. Tedy: Newest reader of my blog, and brought back to blogging, again by [ahem] my blog, am sure could do wonders with this tag. But I am not sure which of his blogs this tag should go to, well thats his pick.

3. M.Rose: Actually she is the newest reader, I know you’d like this one dear 🙂

4. Kochuthresiamma: She is pretty regular with her blogging, so I hope she wont mind taking this up.

5. Robbie: He has been taking long breaks with his blog, the villain being hectic work. Time to push all that work away and do more important things, like taking up tags Robbie bro!

6. Nikhil Menon: Kid reader of my blog, not sure if he might have already done this.