An August Evening

My favorite months are July and November. There’s no reason for that. Just like my favorite number is 6. I just like them. But this August evening, I feel good that it is August. I don’t think it’s the season. The rains are a little silent now but I don’t know if they are totally gone. I still feel cold in the nights and at the strike of 10 in the morning. Two times when I have to follow protocol and take baths. That’s when you notice how cold, cold is. Otherwise you just drown under a pile of blankets or clothes, whichever it is you find sprawled on your bed.

I can see the evening becoming twilight through the glass windows at the other side of the office. And the blindening (darn there is no such word but I refuse to auto-correct) sun. Why can’t it always be this way, throughout the day? The sun up there and twilight down here. That way we still have days, just darker and more walker-friendly.

I don’t know what suddenly made August so dear, but I have an idea it is that window I look at to see the changing color of the day. The color that makes me want to jump out of the office and soak in the outdoors, and one that makes me want to drown under that pile of clothes sprawled on my bed.

Music, stars and sky

 

Now that I am leaving my job soon, I was thinking about the things I’d miss. And last day on my way home, I was thinking how much I’d miss the bus trips. Its true I always curse the 1-hour long all-around-the-city trips. But now that I know I wouldnt have them anymore, I am starting to miss them.

The first thing on my mind when I get on to a bus is to get a window seat. Once I grabbed a comfortable one – (the back rows are the best cause you could experience most of the thrills of a really jumping ride in an amusement park) I’d open the window wide enough until the person sitting on the fornt seat say “ouch” when it hits his unsuspecting elbow. Its like a routine.
1. I climb the bus,
2. I grab a window seat, 
3. a person says “ou” in about 2 mins and
4. I say sorry.
I have a suspicion people watch me with hostile eyes and offer special prayers on Sundays they dont get a seat in the neighborhood of the famous Ms Window Hitter.

Me, oblivious to all these happening in my surrounding, go on happily and look out till I can see the sky. Then I get my mp3 player out, fiddle about for batteries (cause most of the time the batteries die pretty fast – there should be some way to preserve them and make them stop getting used when I would be having it on and dozing off not hearing a thing it plays) and play a song I think is most suitable right then. Talking about that, it works either way I have discovered. I am talking about moods you see. Sometimes I’d play songs which I think should match my mood and sometimes my mood keep changing to match the songs I play. We connect to each other so well, my songs and me I mean.

And then ladies and gentlemen its heaven! If there are people who havent tried before, I’d say they do it right away. Its one of the best combinations ever – night+sky+stars+moon  (if you are lucky enough to have the moon in your view and most of the times I’ve found that it actually listens to me and move around to where I can see it when I ask it to come; the other times I believe it must be sleeping so wouldnt hear me) +music+wind that blows through the window and move your hair all over (you’d be an untidy mess by the time you reach home but thats the price you gotta pay for a trip to heaven people!). It just takes your mind above eveyrthing else, you’d find it floating around. Well now there can be a difference – I am talking about the sad times you see. All these things, funnily, go along well both on your sad days and your happy days.  Its like the sky and the moon and the wind and the music are all there with you sharing your same thoughts and feelings. Its like a group of friends mourning together sadly or singing together happily. They are with you, thats the whole idea.

For a few days, I have been so happy about hearing the music and watching the sky in parallel, that after I get down from the bus I’d go straight down to the parking region where I could look up and watch the stars and dance to the music I hear without anyone seeing me (hopefully) and go home after that. But one day, I found that I was terribly depressed and I just couldnt listen to or smile to the music I heard even after I got a side seat and saw the sky. Even the sky seemed to be mourning with me as it turned all cloudy. I imagined the stars were hiding to cry in peace. Talking about stars, I have named about 21 stars that I could recognise (I actually named them when I was 20-21 so that there’d be as many stars as my age) and my favorite one is one I call Vinnie. I imagine there is a girl called Vinnie  (yup the star was named Vinnie after the girl Vinnie who lives there) in that star and the twinkling I see is when she switched her lights off and on so I’d look up and talk to her. I in turn, wave my mobile phone on and off (ok its a really silly thing but well everyone has a thing like this dont they). Vinnie, on that day, came out of the clouds when I looked up and kept twinkling sorrowfully to tell me she knew how I felt.

Well I guess I drifted away from what I was talking about. So these night bus trips, they are really awesome. I am so sad I will have to miss it in a few days. I hope wherever I go, I will get to have these beautiful bus trips with music to go with it. Car trips are just not the same, its got to be a bus.

And the other day, I had a novel half read so I was wondering if I should read it in the dim light or go for my music-sky thing. Of course the latter won and I had another splendid night.

I just realise that I have a lot of things I treasure a lot without really thinking about it. I mean these trips mean so much to me and I didnt think about it till now, when I have to leave it behind. Sigh, I guess thats the sad reality of life. You never know the value of what you have got when you have actually got it with you. Next day, I will write about all the things I have got now with me, so I will realise how important they are to me before I lose them!

Hullo Feb!

So February is here. I am not sure if I should mourn for January or sing for Feb. February is not my personal favorite cause I dont like the sound of it. It is so unromantic. But then its got Amma’s, Divsu’s, Zacson’s, Chechi’s and Rosily’s birthdays. And then there is Valentine’s Day/Nish’s marriage. That takes care of 6 days and I like February 29th cause its a rare thing. So 7 days being good, I cant really say the month is bad. Maybe I should just call it a different name and it wont be so bad. My favorite month is November – it sounds so perfect. I wish I was born in November.

But theres something about February that makes you think of flowers. No wonder people go for flowers on Valentine’s day. It must be the month flowers first came to earth. It is silly saying it but it is good to imagine that way. I would have called it Florine but I could remember an element with the same name. Thats Flourine and florin means some kind of coin. So I will call it Florine till I could think of another name.

Song : (To be sung like “Tomorrow tomorrow I love you”)

Oh Florine Oh Florine, I love you Oh Florine 

You are so short and sweet!

In the beach

It’s been years since I last went to the beach. The first and foremost thing I like to do in a beach is to get as wet as possible though mostly dipping my legs is as far as I was let to. As a kid I wasn’t allowed to stray away from my Mom’s hands or go anywhere beyond the wave-feet scrubbing level. As I grew up I tried acting deaf when Mom would call from behind to come back.

Today, a friend of mine and I stood for some time against the waves while Mom kept calling us back. As each wave came and touched me and then went away, there was this feeling of ecstasy – if you keep looking at the retreating wave, you’d feel you are moving with it; that you are going to the big mass of water with it. I imagine each wave has a meaning. There are 3 kinds – one which just misses your feet, one which gives a slight rub and one which washes you upside down. The one which just misses you are souls or people who were very close to becoming a part of your life and you somehow missed it – maybe you missed a bus that person and you were going to meet in and be lifetime friends. Then the one which rubs your legs and goes away are those people or souls who had come to be a part of your life for a short while and went away too fast – with or without leaving back a memory. I’d like to imagine it’s after leaving a memory, ‘cause that’s why it touches you – touch your heart you know though literally speaking its your leg. And the final kind, as obvious its people or souls who are all over you – cover you with their love or care or bonding or even hatred and soak you with it.

It was nice imagining all that while I watched the water moving and the sand covering my feet. Infact you could further go on and say that it’s with those second category people who go away from your life too fast that you feel you are taken away too – maybe it’s the pain of seeing them go away.

We went back and walked a little in the sand and then sat down. It was getting dark. The sky was clear – there was a jet plane very far away and the shining star-like things children threw up (I have no idea what that thing is but it looked cool). My friend happened to be this amazing singer. So when we were fairly far from others, we made her sing and hum songs. It was awesome! Sitting there in that sand beach, watching the sky, smelling the sea, hearing the waves, feeling the wind and dreaming in music… Her voice was flowing in the wind. What a beautiful evening it was turning out to be. Those few moments I knew what heaven would be like if there was to be a heaven… I guess heaven is when you feel this happy – it is not where you are. Wherever you are, if you could get yourself to forget things and think and feel this happy you have landed yourself in heaven.

The dinner afterwards and the journey back were not that thrilling; though meeting a friend and family and holding his 2-year old kid added few moments to my book of happy-moments-in-Cris’s-life.

It was a nice day. It was a nice Saturday.  

Goodbye Mr Sun!

Walking in the evening is a pleasant experience. It has never failed to soothe me. I am not sure if mud has a smell. Even if it does, I wouldn’t know cause there was hardly any mud there. All around me were busy roads and vehicles speeding through them. Even then the walk was good. Evening is the most beautiful time of the day, somewhere around 5, when Mr Sun starts to say buh-bye, see-ya-tomorrow.
You could look up and say “Ok Mr Sun see ya. Dont be so early tomorrow” and Mr Sun would probably wink at you had it a couple of eyes.

The cool Mr Breeze is one constant companion that makes it all the more pleasant. Another could be an imaginary companion who walks with you. You can name him Jim-easy to call and remember for your next walk. Plus its the best name after Cris. You can tell him “Where did you disappear to all this while”. And he would reply “I didnt! You just forgot me!”

So you see the distance never matters. You just dont think about it. You keep walking and walking and before you know it you are home. In between, when you forget Jim again, you can see all the things and the people around you- there would always be something that brings a smile to your face.
And its always better to make the walks on Sundays. You would be fresh before the walk. And when its over, you can go to your home, switch on the fan and say “Ahhh” 🙂

Uh another soother is when you could look out to the world when you are travelling in a car or bus from the side seat. Thats really amazing. All the wind outside would come and hit your face and throw your hair on all sides. And if you have got some music going in the background, wow, no words can give the effect that will give! Its just beautiful!!!

Perfect, muddy, wet evening!

I wanted to talk about my evening today. It was just too nice.
I wanted to go to the library, a book 2 weeks overdue already. I thought I will take a walk. It was 5:30 p.m. and I was expecting a friend so my mother stronly opposed my going. But ofcourse little Ms Adamant Cris would not listen to reason!
“Oh I could be back by 6!”

So there she goes out for her stroll with her bag carrying all unnecessary junk. “Why did I have to take my umbrella. It wont be sunny I wont need it. Damn the bag is too heavy”. For some reason (whew!) I didnt leave my umbrella behind. Out I stepped, walked for some 3 minutes and was congratulating myself on coming up with such a tremendous idea. Boom! Was that thunder?! Noooooo please! Splash! Heavy rain started pouring from nowhere! I had taken out my umbrella appreciating my intution. But no, I will have to catch an autorickshaw now and forget about the stroll.

I went, took 2 books and came out. Now the rain was too heavy. I walked with my transparent, allowing-all-drops-to-pass-through kind-hearted umbrella. Sheesh, my jeans was getting wet and dirty. Muddy water soaked my shoes. And then as I was waving at fully-packed autorickshaws my umbrella bent upwards! Gosh it was so embarassing! There I was standing in the middle of the road (well actually it was the side) all wet trying to pull down a resistant stubborn umbrella! I didnt think anymore I just walked. But the thing was I was giggling to myself all this while! Talking to myself, laughing at all that was happening and having a wonderful time! I loved it! I was all wet and dirty but I knew I was having fun. 🙂

Finally I did get an autorickshaw and reached my home exactly at 17:59! Perfect timing! But that didnt seem to impress my mother, she seemed to be more concerned about the dripping appearance of her ever-smiling disobedient daughter!

It was one hell of an evening but I loved all of it! The stroll, the rain, the getting wet part, the flying umbrella, everything! Perfect!

Long live perfect, muddy, wet evenings!!!